March 30, 2008

My brain, let me show you it

You know, there's something about hitting the last third of a book, even a very first drafty draft of a book like this one, that makes my brain go a little crazy.

Normal people do not wander around the supermarket doing page count calculations in their heads much like this:

Crazy brain: 120 pages to go. If you write six pages a day that's only three weeks or so.
Me: Yes, I can do math.
Crazy brain: Oooh, oooh, if you write 10 pages a day, you could finish it in twelve days.
Me: Unlikely but also true.
Crazy brain: Or, how about fifteen pages a day...that's only (pauses for complicated mental arithmetic) eight days.
Me: Didn't I just say 10 pages a day was unlikely? I really don't quite know what happens yet.
Crazy brain: Irrelevant.
Me: I don't think pages a day count if all they contain is "I don't know what happens here" typed over and over.
Crazy brain: Says who - oh and look over there. Chocolate.
Me: We're avoiding sugar, remember?
Crazy brain: Then don't blame me for being crazy. How about twenty pages a day and you'd finish it this week?
Me: I have a day job. I pay your bills. Not gonna happen.
Crazy brain: So? Imagine, book all finished and shiny.
Me: Not gonna be pretty and shiny if I write it in six days.
Crazy brain: Pouts. We could do it if you fed us chocolate? Chocolate makes you write faster.
Me: What do I have to feed you to get you to stop with the calculations already?


Eleni said...

Mel, this cracked me up. It reminded me of the warner bros gambling bug cartoon from yonder years. :) good luck finishing the last third of the book!

Sussan Marz said...

LOL! I thought I was the only one who does page count per day math.

Chocolate only feeds the frenzy!

Robyn E said...

I love crazy brain! And i think i might have one of my own